You caught your cheating wife right in the act. Your first impulse is to smash her head and her partner with the hockey baton lying close to the bed. Please, wait! Breath in, and out. Don’t act out what I just described so that you don’t end up behind bars. Many a man has lost his life, ended the life of others or spent the rest of his productive years serving a life sentence for murder as a result of his cheating wife.

Your heart is racing. Your mind is replaying the sordid image again and again. You’re speechless, and at a loss on what to do. You’re right to feel this way because finding out that your wife is cheating on you with another man is enough to make you want to end her life and probably yours as well. This situation is better imagined than experienced. So, just how do you manage a cheating wife? Is there a ‘bro code’ to untying this Gordian knot? This article explores how you can manage a cheating wife.

Cheating is not only limited to a married wife’s sexual activity with another man. It could also be that such a wife is spending more time communicating with another man. Whatever the reason a wife adopts for cheating, she has broken her marriage vows and she is a disgrace to womanhood. The first question on the front burner in this matter would be: Why is your wife cheating on you? Before casting  the first stone at your cheating wife, let’s consider some factors that may be responsible for this. 

• Lack of attention 

All women, without exception, need attention. They are like a garden that needs constant attention. Your wife may be cheating on you because she is not getting the right attention from you. A woman will naturally gravitate to the opposite sex who notices the minute details about her, and is always there to listen to her. If you don’t give her that sort of attention, you can open her up to temptation.

• Little or no sexual intimacy 

A woman who is not sexually satisfied by her husband may look outside the home. Stories abound of women who confessed to having extramarital affairs because their partner is underperforming sexually. This is not to say that she is justified for cheating.

• Dealing with a crisis or loss

Many women, and men inclusive are at their lowest when going through a crisis or having lost a loved one. She needs you to be there through these moments. She needs a shoulder to cry on, and a listening ear. But if she is not getting this from you, and a colleague at work is available to do all of that, it can lead to an unplanned affair. 

• Troubled marriage 

Everyone needs a break from a troubled marriage. Women are no exception. A woman who is having trouble in her marriage can, as a way of escape, find solace in another man. It may not necessarily be for sex. She needs a listening ear to share her burden with.

• Exploring for fun

Some women cheat not because they don’t have good and loving husbands. They cheat simply as a way of exploring and just catching fun. She may not do this for money nor sex. Just hanging around another man could be a sort of fetish for her.

How to manage a Cheating Wife

If one or all of the reasons explained above is why your wife is cheating on you, the following will help you to manage the situation.

• Figure out why she cheated 

Before hitting the gavel of judgements and divorce on your cheating wife, try to understand why she did it. Was it because of sex or she needed emotional connection? Understand why she ventured into the act. When you do, you can now address the issue.

• Request that your wife end communication with the third party

One of the best approaches to reclaiming your cheating wife is to talk her into ending communication with her cheating partner especially if it has become a second nature. This may sometimes be difficult if the third party is her co-worker or someone she sees on a daily basis. However, if she is unwilling to cut ties with the man, it is a sign that she wants to continue to cheat. Hence, the marriage will be difficult to repair.

• Communicate with your partner 

Communicating with your partner should be done when you’re ready. Let her know how deeply she has hurt you. If she feels a deep remorse about this, it is a sign that she is still interested in keeping what you both shared together. Communication will help both of you come to a truce and make necessary adjustments where necessary.

• Let her set boundaries about relationships outside the marriage 

The root cause of the initial infidelity is her failure to set relationship boundaries outside her marriage. When she sets relationship boundaries, it will be easy for her to cut off communication with the opposite sex that stepped out of line.

• Decide whether to quit the marriage or not

Trusting a cheating wife again can prove difficult, if not impossible. Infidelity is an emotional wound that may or may not heal depending on the angle you’re viewing it. Most importantly, if forgiving your wife will prove difficult, it is better you end the marriage than allow the bitterness towards her fester.

Being married to a cheating wife is like holding onto an electric fence. The outcome is devastating. Some cases of cheating wives have led to deaths, separations, wounds that have gone beyond healing. However, hope is not lost. Communicating your hurt, and adopting the approaches shared above can put your wife and the marriage on track.

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