ParentingRelationship

Developing Father-Daughter Relationship

Father-daughter Relationship
Father-Daughter Relationship

Having a strong father-daughter relationship with your daughter has far-reaching effect on her. Most daughters who grew up with absentee fathers or a father who is emotionally far away struggle with their adult life. Many in this quagmire often end up with the wrong men or even if they got the right men, the experience with their dad while growing up may bring a wedge into their relationship. So, as a father, how can you develop a healthy father-daughter with your daughter? To find out how, read to the end of this article.

What is a father-daughter relationship?

Father-daughter relationship is a relationship that is built on love, trust and confidence. Having a healthy relationship with your daughter is not something you do at a later time. It is what you cultivate right from the outset when you daughter is still a baby. Your presence in her life is not enough. What is the use of a father who is present but critical, controlling, temperamental and or emotionally distant? So, to develop a healthy father-daughter relationship with your daughter will require some efforts on your part and that of your daughter. Because you are the gatekeeper of your family, this article is specifically written for you, and I will be sharing five tips that will help you to develop a healthy father-daughter relationship with your daughter.

How to develop father-daughter relationship?

You must understand that your role as a father goes beyond just providing. Part of your roles is to be genuinely interested in your daughter. Try to find out her struggles and the things the things she may be to discuss without being nosy.

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1. Become your daughter’s bestie 

The female gender, more than anything blossom in an atmosphere of love and where they are valued. To become your daughter’s bestie, you need to understand her. What are the things that interests her the most? What are those things that causes her to withdraw into herself? All these can be known if you form the habit of communicating with your daughter and making her to know that you are always there for whenever she needs you.

2. Avoid being too critical 

Linda Nielson, a professor of Psychology at Wake Forest University and an expert in father-daughter relationships related the experience of a woman with her critical, controlling, belittling father while she was growing up. 

‘As my teenage years approached, I started to see him as he was: lazy, selfish, controlling. Do as I say not as I do! I became more aware of his belligerence, his contrariness, his ability to twist a conversation. So, I always tried to be the best at everything I did, because unless I came first, in his eyes I wasn’t good enough. As we got older, rows and shouting became a regular occurrence. He would come in the door and find something wrong, a smudged door handle, a tiny mark on the paintwork, anything to cause a row. Angry outbursts and punishment would follow. I often cried myself to sleep in desperation and even wished that he would die in a car crash. But, in fact, all I wanted was for him to love and accept me for who I was.’

Being too critical of your daughter’s actions and inactions can trigger negative emotions from her against you as can be gleaned from the excerpt above. If this persists, there will be disconnection between both of you. However, this does not mean you should whisk away every misdemeanor from your daughter because you want to develop a healthy relationship with her. Absolutely, not! For every misconduct, there is always a proper approach to administering discipline. Making effort to let your daughter see the reason for your anger about what she did wrong will make her adjust so as to remain in your good book.

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2. Never expect perfection from your daughter.

Fathers who expect perfection every time from their daughters will only turn them to develop feelings of inadequacies whenever they don’t get something or do something right. These daughters tend to feel insecure if whatever they do is met with criticism. This can make them lose interest even in the things they are good at. So, make allowance for mistakes and make sure to explain in love why they failed and what they can do to get better or achieve success.

4. Practice what you preach

If you want to be your daughter’s hero, then you need to make your words your bond. Never ask of your daughter what you know you cannot do. You must always lead by example.

5. Admit your mistakes

The fact that you are a father does not make you infallible. You are as fallible as your daughter that you are trying to groom. So, whenever you goofed as it is common with every human being, always own up to your mistake by apologizing promptly. Apologizing to your daughter does not make you less of a man. Rather, what it does is to strengthen your bond with your daughter.

Conclusion 

Developing a father-daughter relationship is a not an easy task. It requires effort and determination, caring, supporting, correcting in love and encouraging are some of the things you can do to achieve it. Remember, your daughter is counting on you.

READ ALSO: Understanding In Marriage 

 


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